The Matrimandir

Here is just a quick one, as I am mulling so much over in my head- and am probably thinking too deeply for my own good still. ;) But as it is, I am wondering: what is the difference between spirituality and religion?
The founding thoughts of Auroville come from Sri Aurobindo, a spiritual master, and "The Mother". You find large photos of them everywhere in Auroville, and yesterday we visited the Sri Aurobindo ashram in the city of Pondicherry, where people come to meditate on their graves. There are numerous bookstores filled with their spiritual teachings in all different languages.
And I just keep thinking: how did one woman- The Mother- come to have such a dream fulfilled? What level of spirituality must she have been on to have some people worship her like a god?
Today we visited the Matrimandir. Bear with me for a short description, as the place was literally- in-credible. First of all, it is a huge golden sphere bursting out of the earth, surrounded by 12 large "petals". It was built like this because the mother wanted to symbolize the ultimate divine awareness bursting forth out of the earth like a lotus flower. Each "petal" is a room, and each symbolizes a different state of being/awareness. They are supposed to build up to ultimate divine consciousness.
The Matrimandir is extremely regulated, as the mother had wished for it to be only for those who seek to concentrate. According to her, this center of her city should have no religions, no chanting, no regular meditation, or anything. It is just for concentration.
So after watching 3 movies, examining a room explaining it, and hearing a 30 minute speech on it, we were finally allowed to enter. We had to be in complete silence.
Walking down into the huge golden orb, I felt like I was about to levitate into a spaceship. First we reached a dark chamber alit with a red glow. Here we had to put on clean white socks. Then we proceeded in a silent line up the spiral staircase toward the sacred inner chamber. Walking up the ramp and looking around, I felt utterly weird; I was in a place unlike any other I'd ever been. If the mother was going for futuristic and otherworldly, she had certainly accomplished her goal.
Entering the inner chamber, there were huge white marble pillars reaching about 100 feet up to the sloped ceiling. Everything was white- the walls, the carpet floor, the sitting pillows. There were no windows. All that existed in the chamber was a large crystal ball, sitting exactly in the center of the dark-white room. It was being hit by a single ray of light coming from a tiny hole at the top of the ceiling. The energy was thick.
As amazing as the Matrimandir was, I felt still adrift in my own feelings, distant from the Mother's vision, and having critical thoughts and resistance in my mind. First of all, if there is to be no religion in the Matrimandir and Auroville "should belong to no one in particular", then why do so many people seem to worship pictures of the Mother like a religious figure? Is this simply a case of misinterpretation on the people's part? (I certainly know that there is a lot of mis-interpretation in other religions.)
Also, in myself, I feel that my inner being and True Self is aligned with and in Nature. How am I to find this center when I am enshrouded in a huge expensive weird spaceship ball?
Perhaps I wil come to understand more in time. However, for the moment, since my thoughts have been with the poverty in the villages and trying to process that, I have had a hard time coming to terms with these two radically different existences in my mind. On one side, you have people who come into touch with the Divine out of need and ancient tradition; on the other, you have people seeking the Divine out of progressive spiritual aspiration.
I know that this is all connected and that we are all part of the same Source. Experiencing the different ways of being in touch with this can be such a trip!
On an ending note, when I experience my inner Divine Mother, she is a forest sprite dancing her spirit, emotions, and humanity out in the forest and desert and mountains with her fairy companions. I suppose that the presence here of The Mother can be a lesson to find my unique and beautiful Divine Femininity within.

What is the Balance of Inner and Outer Connection?

Wow. Things here on the Auroville program have been BUSY! The past few days, we have biked around the entire area of Auroville and some surrounding Tamil Nadu villages, experiencing a little of what is going on in some organizations. They are all fascinating! We did some work on the “Buddha Garden” farm, we played with village children in their banyan trees and sand boxes, we strolled through the sprawling botanical gardens, we heard about what goes on at the Healing Center for village women, we learned about natural herbal remedies, and we got caught in a late-season monsoon!

Tonight, we finally went to the Mohanam Cultural Center! I feel like I already had a connection with it, since my friend Allexa volunteered there last year, and my friend Mario threw a, amazing benefit concert for it recently in Seattle.

The place was warm and magical- upon arriving, three beautiful little girls greeted us with fresh flowers and donned us with red bindis, which is both a spiritual practice and a celebration of friendship. Then they gave us a performance of incredible Indian dance and theatre. It was such a sweet place- yellow and bright in color, which mirrored the inspirational energy wafting through it. We were fortunate enough to speak with Baloo, the owner of Mohanam, who has an infectuously bright spirit, and is a local who has grown up in the very same village. His vision with the center is to keep the culture of Tamil Nadu alive and thriving through traditional dance, music, crafts, healing, and other ancient practices. He spoke about how the world- including the villages – is growing exponentially toward modernism. Some people want to keep forging forward at lightspeed, but it is so important to remember the roots of where we have come from, and hold our own culture as something to be celebrated. Mohanam aims to keep this culture alive through giving village children the freedom to explore different aspects of their own culture through learning from their elders, as well as giving them the freedom to express themselves in their own creative ways.

Being in the center, I felt alighted with a sense of expansion, culture, purpose, mystery, and “real-India”. This has been something the group has been grappling with since we’ve been here:  Auroville is very much an oasis within surrounding areas of poverty. It is unbelievable sometimes to see the inequality of wealth living so closely together. It is a very complex undertaking for many of the organizations that we’ve visited to work on weaving together the village culture and the western culture in mutually positive ways. One example is the Matrimandir: the towering golden lotus center of Auroville. It is huge, plated in real gold, and solely a place for Aurovillians to meditate and find their inner selves. If you scan about 40 yards away, you will find malnourished people living in rags and piled trash. They live in extremely close quarters, calling home to small straw and mud huts. Everywhere in the villages you will find many stray dogs, even more cows, and disease-ridden, stagnant water. There is a big question that the group is facing: are things like the matrimandir inappropriate and selfish if there is such obvious poverty existing right in its shadow? It is easy to turn away from these realities when you are surrounded by the comforts of home and western living, but it is not such an easy thing to deny when it is right in front of you. Can one fulfill their truest spiritual purpose better by “going within” to realize their inner self, or by giving of their self to help others who are in need?

  Like I said, these are big questions that we will continue to talk about this quarter. I personally have been staying unattached to any emotional conviction about the issue so far, because honestly, I don’t know the answer. I feel that if you put these questions in different lights, it becomes a lifelong question of balance between cultivating self-connection, and acting with empathy and care for others.

            So as of now, I feel really drawn to working in the Mohanam Center. I ask myself: When else will I have the opportunity to interact with village children in an open creative environment and go out to learn about the local village culture in hopes of helping it to persevere? I do love raw food and have great passion for it, but I feel that I can foster my passion for it at home just as easily as I can here. Mohanam seems to call to my sense of community building, desire to expand my horizons and deepen my understanding of the world, and challenge my comfort zone by exploring a very different reality.

So… wish me luck! J I hope you all are enjoying the first part of 2011! My love is with you all! 

The International Pavilion's Projects

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I hope you all had an amazing beginning of 2011. I am thinking of you across the world!
This post will be short, because we are about to start our first class. I am so excited to start the program officially! SO far, we have been just relaxing, adjusting, and honestly seeing a lot of what the (more than expected) tourists of Auroville see. However, starting today, we will be touring around to different sites where people who live here are working on their own specific projects. Honestly, this place seems like an extended Burning Man- in the sense that people come here to realize their dreams that haven't necessarily been proven to work in "normal" society; however it doesn't matter here because it is all about experimentation and trying new things.
For instance, at the International pavilion here, we will be working with the family who lives here in their projects. They are planning to build two new buildings this year. However, let's talk about sustainability in practice: they are using compressed juice boxes for roofing, since juice boxes cannot be broken down and recycled. These "tetrafan" roof sheets have been invented by an Indian guy about 8 months ago. They are not time tested, but this group is going to try it.
In addition, for the concrete of the walls for the building, they are going to make it out of the usual ingredients: sand and cement, and instead of small pebbles, they are going to use the styrofoam waste of Auroville. This will make the concrete lighter, have more insulation, and be more soundproof. (Plus use this non-biodegradable material!)
For the floors of the buildings, they will use their recycled paper to make thick sheets of paper mache. This will make the floors flexible, which is good for a tall structure in the wind.
ANd one more awesome thing about this place: They have compostable toilets. We separate the pee from the poo, pour sawdust on the poo, and let it sit in barrels for 6 months, so it can turn itself to compost. Then it helps grow the trees and vegetable garden!
Needless to say, I am already amazed at the passion of these individuals who have taken their trade- architecture- and turned it into their own experiments!
And this is just the first place we have seen- I am so excited to visit the dozens of other endeavors and people behind them in the coming week.
Everyone here has this sparkle in their eye- they are doing just what they want to be doing, and it is so inspiring! What a playful and community oriented environment, to be supporting each other in all individual expressions of creative, sustainable invention.
That's all for now, I love you all dearly! I will write soon!
~NAMASTE~